You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™Gay Penguins. I’m not talking Sigfried and Roy gay. I don’t know if these penguins made white tigers jump through hoops of fire. I’m not sure they ever sang “Candle in the Wind”. I don’t know if they like Barbara Streisand or Broadway dinner theater.But apparently the […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The sex life of a fruit fly. Bet you never thought you’d read that, huh? I would fruit fly sex is exciting as pulling gum off a work boot, if your work boot was smaller than Lisa Lampenelli’s heart. What’s the scientific value of fruit fly […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Life NOT imitating art. Paul Walker was killed in a single car crash in Southern California on Saturday. Had life imitated art, the handsome movie star would have miraculously survived. Had life imitated art, the celebrity would have walked away, perhaps a gash on his head, […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Rivalry Saturday. That’s what the NCAA calls it. I like to call it HATE SATURDAY. No matter what you call it, it’s a great college football weekend. This is the college football weekend when teams that historically hate each other play each other. Teams hate. Fans […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Black Friday is crazy. It’s an alarm clock on a Sunday morning. It’s a poke in the eye, intrusive like elephant poop on your living room floor. I hate Black Friday. I hate it because America is tricked, fooled, cajoled into waking up at the crack […]
You know what’s crazy™ A good television ad. I’m watching sports center. It’s Thanksgiving day and Sportscenter is reminding me what I all ready know. I will be watching a lot of football today and eating more than a cow with a distended stomach. FADE OUT SPORTSCENTER FADE IN – SCREAMING COMMERCIALS – DAY It’s […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Googling yourself. Don’t tell me you don’t do it. You do it. We all do it. We like to do it. We want to do it. It’s the equivalent of looking into the internet mirror and seeing what turns up. Do you have warts from 1989? […]
You know what’s crazy?I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ NOTHING. NOTHING IS CRAZY. It’s the Crazy Christmas Gift that says everything by saying NOTHING. I’m on a web site for gifts, crazy gifts, off color gifts, and that’s when I see it: Crazy Gift #11 Nestled in between the fetus cookie cutter and the coffee mug […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Coffee Pot Cooking? It’s crazier than wearing a chum flavored wet suit while surfing. What is coffee pot cooking? It’s a culinary oddity perpetrated by a strange group of food connesuiers. Instead of putting ground French roast in the basket, they stuff a baked potato in […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Texting and driving. It’s the new drunk driving. It’s dumber than flossing with a band saw. It makes as much sense as using a crack whore to do your tax return. Texting and Driving? It’s the new diamond lane of death. T & D? It makes […]