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Category Archive for: ‘The Crazy Critique’
Gravity

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Gravity. It’s a special effects master piece. Space feels real. It’s dark. It’s lonely. It’s Expansive. It’s dangerous. The Earth is so close the characters can touch it, but somehow it is unrecognizable as home. I give Gravity 4 out of 5 Crazies. Sandra Bullock will […]

Put your tongue back in your mouth Miley Cyrus!

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tel you what’s crazy™ Miley Cyrus. Diva? Talent? Train Wreck? Turn on the TV now-a-days and it’s all Miley All the time. It’s like MC TV. Why is she this month’s IT girl? Because she can take off her clothes and generate faux sexuality. Is it real? Or Is this […]

Amish Mafia

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The Amish Mafia. Really. Those are two words you rarely say together. Amish. Mafia. They go together like toothpaste and orange juice. It’s Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid in a Turkish Bath house. Gimme a break. Amish Mafia? What the hell is that? Does the […]

Kanye

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Kanye West. As my 6th grade teacher use to ask us “WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?” Damn times have changed, haven’t they? Now we can’t even throw a dodge ball at a kid’s face, but I digress. Kanye Likes Publicity when it’s on […]

Sharknado

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Sharknado It’s Jaws meets Twister. It’s a storm with a teeth. It’s a tornado with a thirst for blood. Sharknado is the latest greatest who cares. It’s a big fat so what with a dorsal fin. This is a B movie with a capital B. Sharknado […]

Gerbil Fornication

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Men’s Double’s Tennis. Why bother? I realize it’s a sport and difficult to do well and takes expertise and… well, it’s just boring as hell to watch on TV. At least if the players were women, I could ogle four athletic females. Sorry ladies, but this […]

Hot Tub Time Machine

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Hot Tub time Machine – the movie. What a mess. It’s stupider than top soil. Like a baby with 666 stamped on its ass, this film should have never been born. It quite possibly is the anti-Christ of celluloid. So what is the plot? Plot might […]

Man of Steel

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tel you what’s crazy™ Man of Steel. I give it 3.5 out of 5 crazies. Man of Steel is big and bold and down right entertaining. He’s a hunk for the ladies, bulging in all the right places. And there’s plenty of action for the guys. And the man of […]

Baby Names

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s Crazy™ Crazy Celebrity Baby Names. There are strong names like Mason and Alexander and James. There are traditional names like John and Don and Ron. There are names that are gonna get you thrown into a high school locker like Seymour and Sydney. And then there are […]

$150 movie tickets

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ $100 movie prices. That’s jarring to my thought process. It’s disturbing like a mini skirt and halter top on Rosie O’Donnell. It’s unfortunate like drinking Budweiser at a coronation for the Queen. $100 movie tickets? Americans love movies like dogs like an open car window, but […]