You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy?™ Pot Laws in this country. Smoking in some states is legal. In others it’s a slap on the wrist. And still in other states, you can still do hard time for possession of weed. Can you imagine if you could legally drink Budweiser in Colorado but […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The Lake Day! It starts with a feeling, a feeling that I’m going to the lake and you aren’t. It starts with a look out the window at my sad sack neighbors, filling up their push mowers with gas and pulling weeds. I can see the […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy! Sex so loud it has the police knocking on your door, dogs shrieking at the pound and milk curdling in the jug. Look at this couple. This is a wanted poster of tainted love of sexual healing gone bad. This couple is the Anthrax of […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy! How stupid humans have become! I saw a report out of England that said 26% of British teenagers believe that bacon comes from sheep. Bacon from Sheep? Really. What are they teaching you Brits? Not only does sheep make great bacon it makes a fine sweater that […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Ferguson, Missouri. A friend of mine wrote me today and protested my silly story about Mexico scented bath soap. “Really,” he screams in angry letters. “Mexican Soap? Why don’t you write about what’s going on in Ferguson.” I was caught off guard by his direct and visceral question. […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Bar Mexico. It’s soap. I received this soap as a gift. The soap touts itself as “Mexican Beer Soap.” That’s right; Mexican Beer Soap. For the man who loves Mexican beer, Mexican women, Mexican lawlessness, do we have the cleansing product for you. The wrapper says: Everyone […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The Technicolor Fence. They say good fences make Good neighbors. Not this fence. This fence is an instigator, baking soda dropped into a bucket of lye. This fence is a molitov cocktail, a poke in the eye, a slap in the face. This neighborhood barrier is […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Streets of fire. I still love that news jam. Like any old dinosaur who has been around the tar pit a time or two, the jam doesn’t come as easily as it once did. To feel that visceral over load now, the jam’s gotta be something […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ The slow motion commute of death. A new study says rolling to work might be killing you. We need a study for this? I know it’s killing me. Every morning, every evening. You climb into your car and you immediately start applying the brake. Your engine […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Robin Williams hanging from a door, a belt around his neck. The thought is repulsive, unbelievable. Robin Williams’ suicide is seismic, the equivalent to Whitney Houston dying in a hotel bathtub. There’s a sense of loss, a sense of isolation, a pain that haunts a man. […]