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Category Archive for: ‘Uncategorized’
Old TV

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Choosing a new TV. What size. What model? Smart or stupid. Plasma? LED? COD? My Plasma went dark the other day. A dark TV has few options. It’s a paper weight? A boat anchor. An interesting item to look at on garbage pick up day. Dark? […]

Ancestral Spit

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The DNA test. “You mean I gotta spit in this tube?,” I say staring at the empty chemistry beaker in my hand. “Spit in the tube,” the girlfriend responds. “But it’s kind of gross,” I say poising the plastic test tube to the underside of my […]

Driving with Ants

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Driving with ants. “What the F, dude!,” I yell over the sound of a Linkin Park guitar riff. Spotify is playing the band after their lead singer was found hanged to death in his home. “There are ants falling from the roof,” I say with emphasis. […]

Cameo

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Revisiting something great. I wake up this morning to a ding in my in box. It hammers my frontal lobe like a gay jack hammer dancing the Paso Doble on Dancing with the stars. Wow, that’s loud I think to myself as I fumble for the […]

What Goes Up…

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ What Goes Up…. I’m at Gate 24 in the Denver International Airport. The departure area is a human waste basket of legs and arms and bad wardrobe selections. Spandex and Hawaiian shirts and who authorized the wearing of Yoga pants in Public? As I scan the […]

Right Field Bar

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Going to a bar and a baseball game breaks out. I’m seated at the Band Box in Sulfur Dell. This part of Nashville was once a reclamation project for hobos and old rusted warehouses. But like so many other sections of Nashville, a city with a […]

I HATE MY WORDS!

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ I HATE MY WORDS! Yeah, I said it. F you words! And the horse you rode in on. You’ve really been pissing me off lately. I’ve seen you hanging around the computer screen and I’ve heard your delicate sweet whispers to sit down and type a […]

Non Dairy Napalm

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Non Dairy Creamer. It comes in a white plastic jug. There is a picture of a cartoon dairy cow on the front. She is smiling, inviting, urging me to pour the creamy delicious contents of this jug into my morning joe. Moooo! And pour I do. […]

Graduation Reflections

You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Graduation 2017! Middle School. High School. College. All over the country their is a universal, timeless right of passage taking place. It’s a time where young people walk through a life portal and gaze at a universe that has always been there, but suddenly resonates on a […]