You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ My gigantic rotting pumpkin head. My cranium is saturated with phlegm. It’s like soupy gelatin that has yet to coagulate. My body is suffocating in its own rancid juices. There’s a viscous broth filling my lungs, my nose, my sinuses, my eye sockets. It’s a gelatinous […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy Saturday Night Live. LIVE FROM NEW YORK IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE. It use to give me chill bumps. Now it makes me wince. It use to be appointment TV. Now it’s a cue to turn out the light, the party’s over. The show has always been […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The Dead Horse. The horse is young and cannot stand. The mare is dying, starving, emaciated. The pitiful animal is sprawled in the cold wet mud, clinging to whatever life she has left. I watch the iPhone footage of the listless animal. It lays motionless on […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Super Loud LIII. All around me is noise. A cacophony of white hot blistering noise. The cheers, the announcers, the sound of grown men smashing each other like mountain goats. It’s mind numbingly loud. A dark complected man wearing a flowered shirt to conceal a large […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy TWITTER SLANDER. Twitter launched in July 2006. 140 characters and a cloud of dust in the ether of instantaneous dissemination. In the beginning TWITTER connected people in a way that was unique and fun. 140 characters meant you had to be economical with your words If […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Perception versus Reality. I learned this in Journalism 101 my 1st day at USC. The instructor showed us a newspaper photo. It shows a man wearing a suit exiting a building. “I’ll tell you this,” the instructor says. “The man is the mayor of the town, […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The former employee. You passed them in the hall, and said hello. You sat next to them in meetings and took notes. You possibly learned the name of their significant other. Nice. Then like a match in a hurricane; poof. It’s all gone, extinguished, so much […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The reality of Fantasy. It’s known as the addiction that is Fantasy Football. Fantasy Football is a drug. It’s an addiction that is one part gambling, one part social experiment. It’s an endorphin rush that energizes the soul. You can be fat and play fantasy football. […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Muddy Waters in the Middle Seat. It’s 5 am. The line of Portland Passengers standing in line to board flight 1099 to Dallas is long. I’m tired. It’s hard to focus. Travel day is always stressfull. Starting at 3 am is just a time bomb. So […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy The Jewelry Store. Ding. I look down at my phone. “Hello! Your item is ready for pickup.” I stare at the message. My item is ready for pickup? What Item? What Pick up? Is this is a scam? That’s my first thought. I google the number. […]