You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ watching a soccer game in Spanish. I can’t understand a damn thing. The accent is fast and furious with consenants and vowels spinning out of control like a rinse cycle in a Maytag washer. With your eyes shut it sounds like a Mexican Soap opera with […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™ 90 year old women fondling Chippendale dancers and Chippendale Dancers grinding over somebody’s grandma like a sexual car wash with a blown water hose.DATELINE: SIN CITY From the city where “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas”, comes a torid and steamy story of extreme “cougar-ing.”It’s […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Dieing in the dentist’s chair. few places are worse in life, no less death. Maybe the gynaecologist’s stirrups or the latex section of Hustler Hollywood, maybe a San Francisco bath house on Valentines Day. Many of us are afraid of the dentist. With good reason. This young […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ 312 MILLION DOLLARS! It’s a number so big, it has Copernicus doing donuts in a WalMart Parking lot. It’s such an unfathomable amount, Steven Hawking can’t compute the gravitational pull of this lump sum to the influx of new friends and family suddenly friending you on […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™ FRIVOLOUS LAW SUITS! You all know how That’s Crazy hates it when idiots misuse the legal system. DATELINE: IDIOTVILLE, U.S.A. Here’s the scenario: A thief steals a Starbucks’ tip jar off the counter. The bad guy runs from the store. A coffee drinking good Samaritan chases […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy! End of the world predictions. Every time you turn around some chicken little imbecile is telling me the sky is falling. Prognosticators with the credibility of Tiger Woods at a wife swap 12 step program tell me when my life is going to blow up. Someone […]
You know you’re crazy when…You know you’re crazy when you are working out, taste your own sweat and you think it needs more salt. You know your crazy when you order a pizza half pepperoni and half sausage. You’re even crazier when you re-order it all sausage with one half pepperoni. You know you are […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ This headline: Squirrel Stalks Vermont Neighborhood You read right! This squirrel has nuts the size of bowling balls and a nasty disposition that would make Don Rickles wince. DATELINE: BENNINGTON, Vermont. It’s in this bucolic landscape that a little grey squirrel has gone rogue, attacking three residents. […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ The microscopic dissection of the Royal Wedding. It’s being ogled like a Beverly Hills wife browses the glass jewelry counter at Tiffany’s. Kate and William are germs in a global Petri Dish. Cameras from the BBC to the Hubble Space Telescope are focused on their Royal Hotness. Kate […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™A woman failing her driving test 90 times. This isn’t a re-entry scenario for Apollo 13. This is a freaking driving test. The stupidest person on Earth with an eye patch and pirate scurvy can pass a damn driving test. But not a woman from England who […]