You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™
The Tow Truck man.
I have met a lot of tow truck guys in my life and they are a different breed.
Most of them are big burly Paul Bunyan like bastards who wear short sleeves even in the icy throws of winter.
Somehow they stay warm, their veins coursing with 30 weight motor oil.
Most of the Tow Truck guys I have met are covered with axel grease and road grime. They exfoliate with gravel, they floss with snow chains.
Most of the Tow Truck guys i know are solid, big like the machines they operate.
And when it comes to intelligence, let’s just say these guys are a few lug nuts short of a load.
But this tow truck guy, he is different, in a sad, perverted sort of way.
He is skinny, about 5’8″ tall, maybe 140 pounds soaking wet.
In the winter he has as much insulation as a skinned knee.
In the summer, he is a sweat stain on humanity.
This perverted little tow truck man has deep piercing blue eyes that see the world in a twisted way.
He wears a long, Civil War style beard that hasn’t been in style for over 150 years.
“I’ll give you a price break if you take off your clothes and let me satisfy myself”, he tells the young woman.
Now that’s one helluva door buster isn’t it?
What a demented little life force. Can’t afford the price of the product or service? Perhaps we can work something out.
While illegal, it is an imaginative cost cutting proposition.
Take off your clothes and watch the savings roll in.
Can you imagine Crazy Eddie offering a deal like that?
We’re so crazy, we’re taking off our clothes! We wouldn’t want any friction to slow us down.
The woman’s car was towed to his scuzzy little lot. When she couldn’t pay the 175 dollar tow lot fee, he said “maybe we can work something out.”
Apparently, a price negotiation is not all he wanted to work out.
The woman said she was creeped out by the tow man. She said she cried and she left the tow lot on foot.
When she got home, her fiance told her, “go back and record his illegal proposition.”
Though it was dangerous, she did just that.
She said the tow truck man pledged to pay a portion of the tow fee if she took off her clothes and let him jerk his own gears, so to speak.
She secretly recorded the 33 year old perp propositioning her. When it was safe to do so, she jumped out of his car and ran for help. she flagged down a cop car and spilled the beans.
When the cops interviewed the scrawny tow truck driver with the Civil War disposition, he couldn’t deny the crime, telling detectives he’d done it to other women as well.
Suddenly law officers had a serial sex fiend behind bars.
But how many women did he violate before being identified?
Cops are not sure and now are asking anyone who has been towed by this sinister little sperm cell to step forward.
Meanwhile, the woman who didn’t take her clothes off, says she spoke to the news because she doesn’t want what happened to her to happen to another young woman.
The tow company fired the miscreant tow truck driver and waived the tow costs for the victim.
Wonder what a tow driver wears in the prison shower?
Life’s Crazy™