You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
A monkey with an AK – 47.
It sounds like a punch line to a joke.
Like how many chimps does it take to screw in a light bulb in a thatched hut?
If he’s toting a fully automatic weapon with a full banana clip.
My dad just sent me footage of this unusual incident.
Imagine if you will a bunch of African army guys sitting around the campfire after a hard day of raping and looting and pillaging a rival clan.
Suddenly a monkey saunters into camp.
The monkey scratches his monkey ass and the soldiers laugh. (Isn’t it funny how monkey ass works in any language on any continent?)
If a monkey shows up suddenly at Yellowstone, we’d give the monkey some cookies and break out our cameras.
But this is the heart of the Congo and these guerrilla fighters see monkey’s in their back yard all the time.
Monkeys in the jungle is like chickens in Alabama. It just is. It doesn’t raise an eye brow – Unless that chicken is packing a gat.
So the guys in the jungle yuk it up and laugh at the little ape and then the story takes a bizarre turn.
One of the gunmen hands the little simian a weapon.
Well monkey see – monkey do.
RAT A TAT A TAT A RAT A TAT!
Guerrilla fighters scatter like a Kardashian sister in a jewelry store.
The little monkey starts blasting.
It’s Planet of the Apes meets Terminator.
Bullets are flying and the guys are running. The monkey clears the circle jerks in about 3 seconds flat.
Nobody is apparently killed and the monkey, feeling triumphant, raises his weapon over his head screaming like he has just given Tarzan a lead hot enema.
Monkeys shooting guns at Guerrillas. It’s classic video you don’t see every day and it makes me salute YouTube and wonder how we wasted time as effectively before the invent of this on-line eye candy.