You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.
FACEBOOK’S FACELIFT
So much global anger people.
You would have thought a dog lifted his leg and relieved himself on our new satin pajamas.
Our whine across the globe has been so loud, you would think that citizens were protesting famine in Sudan, or Bank of America’s disgusting handling of the mortgage crisis.
But to my dismay, WE are not angry about this. Apparently none of these substantive issues is what has given all of us a collective tummy ache.
No the querulousness being lathered across the internet so loudly so profoundly, so definitively is the change in our FACEBOOK profiles.
Yes I said it. A relatively slight alteration in how we use a social network has caused cosmic consternation.
Hey people; FACEBOOK is free. If you don’t like it, leave it. Go and waste your bosses time somewhere else. I hear this thing called Angry Birds is fun.
The problem is, FACEBOOK is addictive, and used by 750 million people in igloos and tents and penthouses across the planet.
Nobody likes change and change has prompted a rebellion.
If it ain’t broke don’t fix it is the old adage. Apparently FACEBOOK knows better and has altered how its web site works.
But that’s not good enough for a majority of you, who have spent a tremendous amount of time coming up with clever and not so discreet ways of letting Mr. Zuckerburg know that you are not happy with his FaceBook fix.
So what is the latest on the internet behemoth?
Well, for starters, instead of defaulting to your friends’ most recent posts, the News Feed (which people hated when it was introduced) is now topped in many cases by what Facebook calls “Top Stories” for you.
According to CNN: It uses an algorithm that combines such factors as which friends you interact with most and which friends’ posts have the most comments and “likes” on them.
The Facebook Blog developer Mark Tonkelowitz said the idea is to help people who may not log in to the site all the time find the best content, not just the newest.
“Now, News Feed will act more like your own personal newspaper,” he wrote. “You won’t have to worry about missing important stuff. All your news will be in a single stream with the most interesting stories featured at the top.”
PEOPLE WENT CRAZY.
CHILLAX. It’s not life and death. It’s not like you are pulling a dying motorcycle rider from beneath a burning car. It’s not like you are being skulled by a flaming NASA school bus from outer space. It’s a freaking web site where you mostly talk about baking banana bread and other pedestrian crap.
Well La Dee Dah.
You know what’s crazy? That this kind of concerted world energy force is wasted on FACEBOOK.
If this many of you got together to protest health care or border crossing policies or the insane US tax code, maybe – JUST MAYBE – we’d actually accomplish something.
Instead of creating angry posts against FACEBOOK, why don’t you organize against the do nothing congress that ratifies 16 dollar muffins. Why not combine your Facebook hatred for a force of good that brings up test scores for U.S. students.
Why not demand justice for a world filled with intolerance and irrationality?
It’s a shame how much Americans don’t care about things that MATTER. It’s a shame how much time time we waste on things that are arbitrary and capricious.
It’s the reason more Americans know who John Mayer is than John Boehner.
In case your wondering, musician/actor – crying Speaker of the House.
I guess being passionate about anything is cool. I just sometimes get crazy that YOU waste so much collective passion on something that will generate as much end result as a leaf falling from a tree.
Passion is purpose. Collective passion is force. Purposeful Force can change the planet.
Post that on your Facebook page Facebook friend.
It’s all crazy.