You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.
A bra that doubles as a mask.
The inventor touts this undergarment as a life saving air filtration system that lifts and supports.
I bet Playtex never thought about that.
A bra that doubles as a mask? It sounds like something Scooby would say to Shaggy on the Cartoon network.
Anyone got a Scooby Snack?
“it’s a bra and a face mask” I know this sounds like the punchline to a joke, but it’s for real.
Dr. Elena Bodnar is the inventor who won the Ig Nobel Prize for this whatcha-ma-call-it.
First some facts. 
Bodnar is the Director of the Chicago based Trauma Risk Management Research Institute. She reportedly developed this over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder (learned that in 3rd grade). She says that with the flick of a pinky, one bra becomes two life saving face masks.
Bodnar is the Director of the Chicago based Trauma Risk Management Research Institute. She reportedly developed this over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder (learned that in 3rd grade). She says that with the flick of a pinky, one bra becomes two life saving face masks.
I don’t know about you, but I’ve often wanted to wrap a bra around my face and breathe in the sweet nectar of love. But would I wear it through a dust storm in Algiers? I don’t think so.
Dr. Bodnar calls her bra a life saver. She says you unhook it from the “boys” and then wrap it around your face. Breathe in deeply and it cleanses the air should you suddenly be enveloped by a fire or a dust storm.
Or perhaps you just think two D sized cups around your face is a good cocktail hour look. It’s really up to you.
Think of the possibilities this device affords one: Besides supporting your chestal region, it can help prevent the Swine Flu. It can double as a paint respirator. It makes a fine Bank Robbing disguise.
Can you 
Imagine millions of women in
Imagine millions of women in Tianamen Square wearing the hot pink bra-masks on their dainty little faces. Like pedalling zombies they ride their bicycles through the emergency, whatever that might be.
Compelling argument for such a unique product huh?
My always demented mind visualizes a few problems with the new bra mask.
First: What about the men Doc? You a man hater? Last time I checked, only 1% of the men out there have boobs. What about the other 99% of the other 50% of the world? What are we suppose to do? Pull off our underpants and breath through the crotch hole? If the disaster doesn’t kill us, the musty smell of old nut sack surely will.
Secondly; Some women should always go topless. Perky and strong. Cover girl sleek. Why even wear a bra? Let the wind be your support. You are a Polynesian princess who makes men’s heads turn. But for a vast majority of women, island princess is not a realistic body type. For many women, sagging, flapping, gravity filling mammary vessels are the norm. Their bosoms are meant to be holstered, positioned and kept firmly in place.
Can you imagine a throng of topless women emerging from the smoke filled building donning Barbie Pink bra-masks. Boobs bouncing, neon swaying. It’s a zombie movie without any Dramamine.
According to the published report; Bodnar says she first thought up the idea while treating victims of the 1986 Chernobyl nuclear disaster as a medical university graduate in her native Ukraine. Bodnar is now trying to manufacture and sell the mask.
When asked about the other 50%, Bodnar told a gathering at Harvard University;”Isn’t it wonderful that women have two breasts, not just one? We can save not only our own lives, but also a man of our choice next to us.”
Upon further review; if the air grows thick with smoke or there is an outbreak of piggy virus, and the woman next to me has two breasts, and one bra-mask and she is willing to share, I would gladly accept the invitation.
And that my friends is Crazy!