You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
A man who surgically implants a camera in his head.
Talk about point of view. Talk about seeing things from your own perspective. Talk about a conversation starter at a cocktail party.
“Hey can I take your picture with my forehead? Just let me part my scalp.”
Weird huh?
According to the Wall Street Journal: A New York University photography professor plans to have a camera surgically implanted into the back of his head.
Wafaa Bilal, is an Iraqi assistant professor in the photography and imaging department.
He calls his insane project: “The 3rd I” commissioned by a museum in Qatar.
“I have had the idea for the project in the back of my head (no pun intended) and am delighted to now see it come to reality,” he said.
I don’t know whether to salute Bilal for innovative thinking or slap his face for random stupidity.
The first thing I wondered is how big is the camera? I sure hope its not one of those 35 MM Cannon SLR’s. Those things weigh 5 pounds, though they reportedly can get great action shots of Andre Agassi playing tennis.
Imagine the great sports photography you could get with a Cannon Rebel mounted to the back of a human skull. You would have to stand at the tennis court with your back to the players. To know when to shoot, you’d have to hold up a mirror. You’d be like a trick shot artist in Wild Bill Hiccups Western Show. You get to watch the crowd while you shoot the action. Now that’s crazy!
Can you imagine the Sports Illustrated Swim Suit edition shot with a camera mounted on the back of your skull. The shots would be of shoulder blades and out of focus belly buttons and a model sneering. It would set a new bench mark for blind, backward, skull photography.
According to published reports, and much to my chagrine, the camera is not going to have a telephoto lense that pops on and off. The story indicates a thumbnail sized camera will be surgically implanted into the back of the man’s skull.
That makes it sound all the more safe and acceptable doesn’t it?
According to the Wall Street Journal; the camera will take still pictures every minute for one year and feed those pictures to a museum in Qatar.
Officials say the camera would be affixed to the professor’s head through a piercing-like attachment.
“Piercing like attachment!”
What the hell is that? Like a bolt and a metal bracket stapled into his skull? Is it one of those Home Depot things that hold your bird shaped thermometer to the side of your fence?
How inconspicuous.
When you go through the airport metal detector, you won’t set off any spinning red lights. When it rains, your head won’t rust. And lightning won’t be attracted to your skull like an alley cat sniffing tuna.
Nothing says ultra cool like a surgically implanted skull camera brother!
In a related issue, the Journal reported that the project has raised privacy issues in regards to his students and their rights in the classroom.
Fred Ritchin, associate chairman of the department, said having students “under the burden of constant surveillance” is “not a good teaching environment.
University officials are working on developing rules for the project while the professor has agreed to cover the lens while on campus.
Cover the lens while on campus?
What is that? A lens cap for his head? A yamikah? An eye patch worn backward? A clump of awkward pony tail left to cover the lens like a curtain at a peep booth in Denmark?
I don’t think these museum folks have thought this all the way through?
The school is essentially saying, “We can’t stop him from disfiguring himself with a camera in his skull plate, but we’ll be damned if we are going to allow a blurry, out of focus shot to be taken while he is in a public space. That is just outrageous.”
This guy actually has a web site that is counting down the seconds to his photographic disfigurement.
If it’s crazy, I’m all for it.