You know what’ s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The median. What the hell am I doing out here? It’s like an automotive deserted island. I’m a freak show in a grass cage, as hundreds of cars drive by, gawking, staring, wondering. “What the hell is that news man doing out there?” It’s 90 […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Angry Dwarfs. It’s like crazy birds or wacky weasels without the free app. Angry Dwarfs sounds like a drinking game at State College. Toss the little person in the red solo cup and every one drink. From the totally absurd department, this one is a real knee […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ 3-D My friend says to me, “I don’t know if it is worth the extra money.” I look at him and laugh. He is wearing his goofy 3D glasses and his Windsor knot scarf inside the theater. Oh it’s worth it Oliver Twist. It’s worth it. […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Staring at the interminable void and putting down thoughts. The white space on my computer screen is alluring and intimidating. It calls to me like a child predator with a candy apple. I am afraid, still I shuffle closer. “hello little boy. Would you like to write a […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Prehistoric stupidity. How dumb are humans? Intelligence fluctuates between soap dish skum and toe nail clippings. If Darwin had his way, all the stupid fools on this planet would forget how to inhale. They would close their eyes and disappear in a paste of sedentary goo. But […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The Jared Conspiracy. Are you kidding me? The guy loses 200 pounds eating Subway sandwiches. He’s a nobody, a fat guy, a ticking time bomb of cholesterol. And then he stumbles onto a culinary gold mine of an idea. This over weight jiggle belly starts eating every […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The bag boy’s overwhelming needs to question my grocery etiquette. “You want your milk in a bag sir?” I stare at him. He’s a punk ass kid with pimples and bad breath. He wears a smock for a living. His collar is stained with his own neck […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. Is it America? Is it tradition? It sure is disgusting. I tune in once again to ESPN, and there it is, center stage from Coney Island. A thousand or more people screaming, holding signs, waving hot dog symbolism like that […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The young boy who became a soldier and a man. I’m watching this baby soldier stand tall and proud at the front of the cathedral. It’s an open air pavilion, the wall is the sky. The alter is the sun. The angels are dancing on a cloud […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy?™ College Saturdays. I’m sitting in the backyard. I have the windows open and I’m listening to the Auburn vs Clemson game. The announcers are hyped. The crowd is roaring. The electricity that is college football is in the air. Listening to a game is nothing like […]