You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™
Filibuster: (N) – an action such as a prolonged speech that obstructs progress in a legislative assembly while not technically contravening the required procedures.
Senator Ted Cruz’s Filibuster on Capitol Hill was a doozy!
Senator Cruz delivers an all night speech against Obamacare as the big health care vote looms.
I turn on Fox News, and I see a countdown clock.
It’s Wednesday morning 9am CST and there is a clock graphic. It’s running, documenting time, as this man speaks.
19 hours 22 minutes and counting.
Is this history? Is this worth a countdown clock?
The camera is locked down on this white guy with a sweaty forehead.
His tie is loose around his collar. His suit looks rumpled. His eyes look heavy.
He is reading and pointing and staggering ever so slightly like a drunk Dradel on a Hanukkah high.
He is fumbling with his notes. It looks like a chaotic ream of paper tossed from a tornado in front of him.
He talks about the voodoo legislation he vehemently opposes.
But he talks about everything else too.
What else can you do for 19 hours, standing at a podium.
I watch as he wipes his forehead.
Perspiration. That’s good, I think to myself. More perspiration means more excretion of harmful bodily fluids through your skin. The more excretion of deleterious substances through the pores, the less potty breaks that are necessary, because during a filibuster leaving the stage is prohibited.
As Malcolm X once said “Excretion, by any means necessary!
So I’m watching this senator and Fox news has him full screen. To the side of the screen, Fox talking heads are dissecting him, the legislation, the filibuster itself.
The talking heads are arguing whether this is a valid move this late in the process. They are arguing whether this is raising public awareness or wasting time in a grandiose scheme of misdirection?
Is it a political shell game?
What you think about Obamacare is one thing. What you think about the filibuster is another.
I would argue that it’s what makes this country great.
FREEDOM OF SPEECH GUARANTEED BY A CONSTITUTION OF RIGHTS.
Eat those words Iran! Chomp on that sentence Afghanistan! Up your nose with a rubber hose Syria.
This is why broken and stagnant, America is still the big dog of freedom on the block.
When a puffy faced white guy can take the legislative stage and talk his ass off about topics near and dear to his heart, that’s America.
I would hazard a guess that most Americans couldn’t tell you what the hell Obamacare is about.
Christ, most Americans interviewed on Jimmy Kimmel can’t tell you what the 1st amendment is.
That is sad. My “America is stupid” rant is coming soon!
So I listen to this pasty-faced Texan and he is on a serious filibuster roll. At one point he compares Obamacare to Star Wars.
Texas Senator Cruz says “the rebel alliance is fighting against the empire, the Washington D.C. establishment. I am fearful I will we see a tall man in a mechanical breathing apparatus say in a deep voice “Mike Lee I am your father.” This is a fight to restore freedom to the people. To get the Washington establishment, the Empire to listen to the people. And like in the movies, the empire will strike back.”
Huh?
How much cough medicine is this guy guzzling?
Is his urination catheter backing up poisons into his system?
“This is his Alamo” the Fox talking head spews.
Say what you will, but I am intrigued by the filibuster. It really is a marvelous instrument of our Democracy.
It is our guaranteed right to govern to free speech to vote our conscious to express our views.
And to the political system, the filibuster is the triathlon. It’s a 21 hour oration that borders on nonsense and lunacy. Instead of biking 100 miles and swimming through an ocean of stinging jelly fish, a politician stands before the country, soaked with urine and passion and pontificates till there is nothing left to say.
Whether you agree or disagree with Senator Cruz, you have to love the fact that we live in a country where you get to stand behind a Congressional lectern and argue your point, in a civil and peaceful way.
If it sways opinions, or gets a dialogue going, then God Bless America, the system works.
In the Middle East a filibuster is a burning flag and firing bullets into the sky to get attention.
Which would you rather have? Bullets flying or a Senator quietly peeing down his leg into a can strapped to his calf?
“When Americans tried it they did not like Green eggs and ham and they did not like Obama care either.” Cruz said, the sleep dripping from his eyes.
Damn. Nothing screams Patriotism like Dr. Seuss!
21 hours and 19 minutes.
What did he accomplish?
Marco Rubio, Florida senator says “Americans are more aware of the dangers of Obama Care than they were. People weren’t paying attention to the debate. Now millions of people have tuned in. Again, how you want your representative to vote is the issue.”
And there it is.
He’s against Obamacare, but undoubtedly, the filibuster brought attention to an important piece of legislation and people are talking and when people talk, sometimes good ideas surface.
The filibuster is about America. Some say this country is broken. At times, it seems like it is broken. But in very few places on this planet, can a man stand and pontificate about legislation, viewpoints, and children’s nursery rhymes.
In Somalia, someone would drill this senator in the melon and drop him like a water buffalo in a field.
In Afghanistan, the Senator would be dragged from the stage, wrapped in an American flag and set on fire.
I do not like Fire Uncle Sam. I do not like it Uncle Sam I am.
So, the next time you see some one voicing their opinion, from the floor of Congress or Main street where you live, nod to them in silent reverence.
America is a long-winded, and great place, where ideas are encouraged, even if they are accentuated by mechanical breathing devices and green colored ham products.
Life’s Crazy™