You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™
I’m not saying the man is dumb, but he skateboarded to a crime scene.
I’m not saying he is a moron, but he handed over his real ID when trying to pawn a stolen cell phone.
Knock Knock. Whose there? Dumb Ass. Dumb ass who?
The guy’s brain is made of spider dung and wet noodles.
Is it me or is the mean average of societal scum diminishing?
Is it something in the water?
Is it the educational system?
Why are today’s criminals so stupid?
This guy walked straight up to a kiosk that takes recyclable electronics and put the stolen cell phone in the receptacle.
The computer screen says – ID please:
He puts his Tennessee license into the slot.
The computer screen says – Say Cheese:
He looks around like a shifty miscreant.
The machine took his picture.
He got paid.
But police also got an 8 x 10 glossy of him caught in the act.
Now the nightly news is running this guy’s mug shot on TV.
“If you know dumb ass’ whereabouts, call the police.”
It’s an add water and stir crime story.
It’s hilarious, unless this menace to society was creeping around your driveway late at night.
Makes you wonder why cretins like this would rather skulk around in the dark of night and try car doors to see what they can get, instead of getting a job.
Is it really easier to grab some stuff from the center console of a 1996 Ford Mustang parked on the front yard of some row house?
I don’t think it is easier to be a thief. I know it is colder. I know it is more dangerous. I know you can get shot and arrested and put on tv like the dumb ass you are.
It is for this reason that I think our educational system is failing. Not only do morons like this think it is easier to steal, but they steal stupid.
Can’t we find something that this guy is interested in, something that holds his attention, something that is law abiding?
Stupid is a dangerous thing. It’s a festering ring of refuse swirling around a drain headed for mediocrity and sadness.
If only this stupid criminal had found his way. If only a teacher had recognized something in this dumb ass that might have turned him around. Geography? Auto Shop? Literature?
Surely something in school must offer more hope than a random unlocked car door on a cold winter night?
“if you see this dumb ass, be sure to call the local police.”
In the meantime, say a prayer for a society where dumb as a box of rocks or a Kardashian is the new normal.