You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
MNF
It all comes down to Monday Night.
Especially for fantasy football.
In a nutshell, my entire season is on the line.
I have no players left to play. I’m up by 11 points. I’m playing against Chris Johnson – running back – of the Tennessee Titans.
If CJ does what he has done most of the year, lay an egg, I move to the championship of my fantasy league where 700 plus dollars is awaiting the winner.
If Johnson suddenly decides he cares or the Jets suddenly decide they can’t handle the pressure, then an entire year of making moves and watching and rooting and praying, well it’s all for naught.
So I’m watching two miserable teams. The woeful New York Jets are playing the Hapless Tennessee Titans. The Jets can possibly make the playoffs if the stars align. The Titans are all ready looking at next year.
The game is terrible. Twitter is blowing up with people wondering why ESPN would even show such a messed up game.
I may live in the Music City, but on this night, I am rooting against the boys in Columbia Blue.
Why? It’s all about the money, of course.
The fantasy predictor says I am going to lose by one. I hope it’s wrong. I kind of hope Chris Johnson sprains an ankle.
1st quarter is uneventful. Still up by 11 points.
Now its the 2nd quarter, Chris Johnson has 9 yards.
Bad for him. Good for me.
Come on Gang Green, hold on to the freakin ball and run that clock.
And bleed the clock they do. The Jets run the ball and tick tock, #24 stays on the bench no threat to me.
The Jets punt. Titans take the ball.
Johnson with a run up the middle. Stuffed. Thank God.
Johnson with a screen pass to the sideline. It’s dropped. Good.
Johnson with a Handoff up the middle.
Oh oh.
He zigs. He zags. Bam. He’s gone. 94 yards. Untouched.
“NOOOOOOOOO” I scream.
My voice is a knife to my own heart. Perhaps people walking their dogs in the neighborhood think there has been a murder.
No murder. Just a fantasy dream being crushed.
Chris Johnson scores a who gives a damn touchdown. The tourette syndrome Bob Marley wannabe goes over 100 yards and his point total boils over like pasta in the pot.
Like a light bulb being shot out with a bb gun, my season goes dark.
$700 dollars in the pot. I had a chance to win it. Now I’m just another has been, also ran, woulda coulda shoulda.
I was ahead 46 to 35. One play later and I’m trailing 47-46.
My God the predictor is right. I’m losing by one.
In a strange fantasy football world, my only hope now is a fumble, or a carry where he loses yardage and goes under 100 yards.
I watch the entire game screaming FUMBLE!
It’s actually kind of sad. And this is the gambler sickness in us all. I am now wishing for crazy plays that cannot happen, will not happen.
My fantasy year is over.
Bummer.
Congrats Bob’s Steroid Monsters. The #4 team knocks off me, the #1 seed. Last year’s champ is dethroned. Somewhere the Miami Dolphins are popping champagne corks. I don’t even know what the hell that means.
I am bummed.
Oh well. no reason to watch who cares teams and terrible games.
Games like St. Louis and Seattle and Kansas City, forget about it.
It’s been a good fantasy year. I probably won more games than I should have with this team I have.
I am listening to the news and the sports guy is talking about Chris Johnson’s run.
First he says, it is the longest run in Titan’s history. and then he points out that Johnson made that run wearing cleats with the names of all the murdered children from Sandy Hook Elementary School.
They show the white cleats with the names of kids scribbled all over the shoes.
Johnson is also a father of 2 and he says wanted to pay tribute to the families devastated by the tragedy.
“i feel like it was a good deed,” Johnson will say. “Anytime you have kids and think about that situation and it makes you know how blessed you are to see your kids every day.”
Johnson plans to sell the shoes to raise money for the victims.
Good for you Chris Johnson. I still wish he had pulled a hammy. But somehow, knowing that the shoes that he wore to beat me also raised money for such a laudable cause, well it makes it all worthwhile.
and that is crazy.™