You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy. The concept of too many games in the NBA. The NBA season is 82 games long. Wow. 82 games. What is that? like 5 months? Can you imagine working for 5 months? The audacity of someone asking you to work less than 1 hour a day […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Six thousand spiders in one 2,400 square foot home. So many spiders crawling on each other, undulating as one gigantic, disgusting, super spider. 6,000 spiders oozing, slithering, sneaking, swinging. Oh my God. It’s a horrific thought, a new horror film, only its real. The spiders now live in an […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ EBOLA. Planes being diverted because a passenger has an elevated temperature and an air sickness bag stuck to his lips. EBOLA. Watch out. It’s scary. “You’re from Dallas? OMG! You just sneezed? You don’t have Ebola, do you?” Ebola. It’s the new millennium version of Swine Flu. […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s Crazy. I HATE CITY PEOPLE The GPS says the trip is 40 minutes out of Nashville. But I know it’s longer than that. We’re going to Hickman County without a passport, without an invitation, without a real address. Hickman County is in this century but not of […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ The Front Row. Sitting in the front row of a movie theater is not preferable unless you are a middle school boy with ADD or a Star Wars Junkie on shrooms. Normally, I like to get to theater early. I like to pick my seat and get […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™ The idea that, Beer is the new Gatorade. That’s like saying 40 is the new 30. NO IT’S NOT. 30 is the new 30. 40 is the old 40. Your gut sags. You wear those stupid glasses to read. You cholesterol is thick like curdled cheese. […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Toys for Hookers. Christmas for call girls. Merry Christmas Mama-cita. Now that’s crazy. I’ve heard of toys for tots. I’ve heard of gun drives where you get a gift certificate at the local supermarket when you turn in hand guns. But I’ve never heard about a […]
You know what’s Crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy! Halloween is approaching. “What are you gonna be this year?” “Huh?” “There’s a party, you going?” “Isn’t it still summer?” you think. And that’s when it hits me. Summer is gone. The grass is not growing. The leaves are changing. The skies are darkening. People are […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ A school where discipline comes at the barrel end of a tazer. WTF? My dog ate my homework. ZZZZAAAPPP! I don’t have enough milk money. ZZZZAAAPPP! Your fauxhawk is against school grooming regulations. ZZZZAAAPPP! DATELINE: QUEENSLAND, Australia: According to the Brisbane Sunday Mail, Queensland teachers had a secret plan […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Boat rides in the middle of a gale force wind. It’s cold out there. Fall is upon us. Reminds me of a chilly trip to the windy city I took a few years ago. Imagine a cold dreary day full of wet rain and gusts of […]