You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
Angry Dwarfs.
It’s like crazy birds or wacky weasels without the free app.
Angry Dwarfs sounds like a drinking game at State College. Toss the little person in the red solo cup and every one drink.
From the totally absurd department, this one is a real knee slapper.
According to published reports, Hollywood Little People are pissed off. They are mad at the filmmakers of Snow White and the Huntsman. I just think they are pissed because they are little people.
According to the diminutive actors, the filmmakers used “average” sized people to fill the roles of the 7 dwarfs.
HUH?
Snow White and the 7 average sized people? It ain’t exactly the way Disney drew it up, but who says you can’t tinker with the original.
Instead of sneezy and dopey and Doc, they have Sven and Glen and Ben. I don’t think that is true. I just like to rhyme.
Average sized dwarfs? It doesn’t make sense. And how the hell do you do that? CGI? Camera angles? Play dough claymation?
So now the tiny actors plan to protest in what is being called a “100 midget march”
I guess this is a million man march just with less feet and less head room.
I’m not sure what a 100 midgets will accomplish? It sounds like a joke. how many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Los Angeles dwarf theater group Beacher’s Madhouse is fuming — arguing that filmmakers would never use white actors and then digitally turn them black.
So the midgets are going to march to Universal’s offices where they will stand on shoe boxes and milk crates and howl at the moon like tiny denizens of the deep.
I wonder if they’d be so pissed if some crazy director decided to re-make Amazon Zombie Chicks 2 and use tiny people rather than gigantic super models. Would the super models protest in their high heels well coifed hairdos?
Director Rupert Sanders used camera angles and special effects to make his average sized actors appear like dwarfs, including digitally inserting their faces on to the bodies of shorter people.
I say so what. Nobody cares when James Cameron computer generates blue naked people in a neon jungle. I didn’t see any protest then?
I say little people be damned. Shut up. Deal with economics of the changing cinematic climate and grow a pair. If the director wants to computer generate a Bull Dog’s anus onto Angelina Jolie’s face, that’s his prerogative. There are no rules. It’s every midget for himself.
If the new snow white means midgets who are giants, then that’s the way it goes.
Get a pair of platform shoes. It worked for Tom Cruise.
And that is crazy.™