You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy?™
Being mauled by crazed chimps.
Eaten and beaten and dragged like a hunk of human flesh.
Monkey’s can be mean ass little bastards.
As Charlton Heston once spit “Damn stinking Apes!”
What the hell is going on here? When did the monkey’s lose their damn simian minds? Why aren’t they nice and cute like Curious George?
This victim now missing toes and fingers and chunks of flesh is a Texas graduate. He is 26 years old and working at the famed Jane Goodall research complex.
The monkey’s are abused and in double fenced pens. He is a devoted researcher who thinks he has a handle on their fickle monkey brains.
He couldn’t be more wrong as the little hairy assassins plot their diabolical plan.
What is clear is that the monkey’s are meaner than crap, stronger than superman and ready to eat some human at the drop of a hat.
They reportedly grabbed this poor guy, pulled him under the electrified fence and then began munching on his ear and his face. They pulled him a reported 1/2 a mile and savaged him for damn near 20 minutes before he was rescued.
When monkey’s go bad!
The guy was torn to shreds with other handlers saying it was an atrocious scene.
The research student is now in critical condition, scarred by crazed monkeys, in a coma, fighting for his life.
Can you imagine the strength of angry monkeys, thinking you have encroached on their territory. They are wild and savage and their teeth are like ceramic vice grips perfect for tearing human skin.
My god.
I pray the guy gets well. And maybe he studies Gerbils. Gerbils rarely go bad. Gerbils rarely pull you under the electrified gerbil wheel to gnaw your brains.
Lesson learned here? If there are two fences, they are there for a reason. Respect the fences. Stay back. Keep two fences between you and the deranged monkey’s. And a rule I always like to follow, never work with abused monkey’s dressed like a banana.
And that is crazy.™