You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™
Grid Iron Devastation!
Alabama beat USC so badly, the university is being investigated for felonious assault.
Nick Saban is cold and calculating, he is the football version of George S. Patton, storming his way through France hanging out of a Sherman Tank and chewing on a hand grenade.
If you are a Trojan, the score was a nightmare where Freddie Kruger is slicing apart your Saturday night down by the lake house.
USC 6. ALABAMA 52.
USC couldn’t muster a touch down. That hasn’t happened in a game since 1997. Offensively SC looked like a blind man crossing the 405 without a guide dog.
Bama’s offense started slow and then rolled like a logging truck going down hill.
Bama’s defense was a bank vault, secure and sturdy. The team hits so ferociously, much of the squad looks like they are ready to compete in the AFC South on Sundays.
And the Trojans? Well the Trojans are still the funny pages lining the cage of a parrot with gastrointestinal manifestations.
If you wear Cardinal and Gold pajamas, the loss was akin to walking down the stairs on Christmas morning and seeing Jack the Ripper cutting your Christmas tree down with a power saw.
If you have a close relationship with Big Al, and bleed Crimson, the score was a sexy reminder that you are very very good. The Tide is a Rolling juggernaut of gritty nasty blues pouring out of a Beale Street rib joint.
52 to 6.
You have better odds of not being gnawed to death on a New York City Subway car wearing a salami suit than the Trojans had against that ravenous Bama defense.
And after Lane Kiffin raised his leg for the last time marking his territory on the Trojans secondary, the game, which was essentially over after 15 minutes, finally concluded.
You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here. Now get out of Jerry World!
When it comes to grid iron greatness, The University of Spoiled Children are not so spoiled anymore.
Wow. 52-6.
It was a bloodletting without the band aids.
Texas hasn’t seen this much fire power since the Alamo.
The promotional build up on ABC and ESPN was relentless.
It was billed as a Labor Day clash of Historical Titans.
The Trojans take on the Tide in Jerry’s World.
USC vs ALABAMA.
Two of the glamour teams in college football kicking off week one in a nuclear white flash of football fun.
27 national championships. 19 Heisman Trophy Winners. So many 1st round draft picks you need an MIT graduate with a slide rule to do the math.
So the network had every right to promote the game like the second coming.
Jesus versus Moses. 2 Messiahs enter only one Messiah leaves.
I’m not sure what that means, but it lets you know just how big this game was suppose to be.
What nobody realized was that USC left their game plan on the bus like a 1st grader forgets his lunch box.
You see, they don’t let you carry a fire extinguisher and brass knuckles into the field. And even if they had, Bama would have countered with a nasty disposition and a big stick.
Max Browne got under center, looked up and saw a raging inferno of defensive hostility.
I don’t know if he wet his pants, but let’s just say, that uniform is going to need some professional dry cleaning.
The kid has waited 3 years to start. and sadly, his performance is linked to words like choke, disaster and obliteration.
And then there’s the Bama quarterback, Jalen Hurts. ESPN just pondered aloud whether he might be the best freshman quarterback to come along in Tuscaloosa in a very long time.
It’s a legit question.
Is USC this bad? Is Bama this good?
Maybe both.
The 1st quarter lived up to the hype.
USC jumps to a 3 -0 lead with a 47 yard field goal.
The Trojans came out blazing. The defense looked fired up and kept the Alabama offense off the field.
Quarterback Max Browne looked poised and lead the Trojans down the field against a stout Bama defense.
But the script was misleading like a Quentin Tarrantino movie that starts at the 1st plot point and then flips the story on its head.
Bama pulled starting quarterback Blake Barnett replacing him with Jalen Hurts.
Suddenly USC’s defense was the Titanic, linebackers throwing deck chairs into the icy Atlantic screaming every man for themselves.
Will Alabama repeat as National Champion?
It’s possible they could win the AFC south.
Life’s Crazy™