You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.
Pulling over a motorist so you can give him a toy.
“There’s two kids in the back seat,” the rookie officer says, flipping on the wig wags.
The siren of his cruiser begins to wail.
He hangs a you turn, crossing over the double yellow like only a cop can.
He accelerates and 8 barrels open up.
RRRRRRRROAR.
The tires churn up asphalt and the foliage begins to blur into a high-speed time warp.
I’m in the front seat with a go pro camera.
I am pretending that this is normal, but we are hauling ass trying to catch up to the car which has a 30 second head start at 50 mph in the other direction.
My cameraman is in the back seat. Out of the corner of my eye, I see his lens poke through the opening between me and the officer.
I am pointing the go pro at the road, then to the officer.
He is a baby face. He is 4 weeks on the force. He seems nervous, has since we climbed aboard.
We’re doing a story on the department’s new program to hand out new toys to underprivileged kids.
Some of those kids live in trailer parks and lower-income neighborhoods.
The cops will drive through these places and make sure children get toys.
But the officers are also pulling motorists over, and not because they broke the law.
We are flying down the 2 lane road, in pursuit of a mother of two like she has just robbed a bank.
I can’t help but wonder if this rookie cop took a special cop driving class.
Please nobody pull out unexpectedly, I think to myself.
Well at least I’m rolling on it, I think to myself between gyrations of the siren.
Suddenly we come upon the little white car that passed us going in the other direction.
The car pulls to the side of the road.
The officer slams the police cruiser into park before we even come to a stop.
Why is this guy so nervous, I wonder to myself.
He will later tell me this is his first TV interview and he is not a good public speaker.
He’s right.
The moment I ask him why we are pulling over cars and handing kids toys, I can tell he is not the blue ribbon winner on the Harvard debate team.
“We want to give back to the community,” he says. “We want to show kids that we are people and they don’t have to be afraid of us.”
A noble thought.
An interesting way to accomplish it.
Run a woman down with blue lights and sirens. Force her to stop and pull over and wait while he walks to the car.
“What did we do wrong momma,” they might ask.
“I don’t know baby. Just hush and let momma handle this” she might respond.
The officer gets out of the car and approaches the woman.
He reveals nothing. “Hello mam, can i see your license and registration please.”
“Of course,” she says.
“I’ll be right back,” he says.
He doesn’t tell her why he has pulled her over. He simply walks away.
The concept is startling awkward.
The officer walks to the trunk and begins to pull out toys.
“Did you tell them what you are doing?” I ask.
“Not yet,” he says grabbing a pink Barbie and a blue bull dozer.
My camera man and I follow him to the driver’s side window.
The woman is bent over, sifting through her glove box.
She doesn’t see the rookie officer standing at her window with 2 big toy boxes.
It’s a badly choreographed movie.
“mam.”
“One second,” she says exasperated.
He doesn’t wait.
“The reason I pulled you over was to give your children these toys.”
Like the sun peaking from behind a dark winter cloud, the woman’s face lights up. Her demeanor changes instantaneously. She takes the boxes from the officer.
“Thank you so much,” she says effusively.
“Merry Christmas,” the officer responds.
“Merry Christmas to you too.”
The officer clears from the window as I move into his space.
“Mam, what was that like getting pulled over only to get toys for your children?”
“It was scary, but the presents were great.”
She tells me she is a school teacher on a limited income. She says the toys for her kids will help her this holiday season. She says she likes the program.
I say good-bye and she drives away.
The cop starts up his car and radios dispatch that he is clearing the traffic stop.
“Hold on,” I say.
He puts down the mic.
“How was that for you?”
“That felt really good,” he says with his first relaxed smile all afternoon. “I wasn’t expecting that reaction. I think I made someone’s day.”
I think he did too. But at what cost?
We pull away from the shoulder of the road.
“That’s all I need,” I say.
And with that, we head back to the police department.
I like the idea of the program, but I can promise you not everyone is going to be so Merry.
Some people hate the police. Some people don’t want to be inconvenienced. Some people might argue that it’s a violation of their rights to be pulled over simply because they have a child in their back seat.
These are all possible story lines for the future.
But in 75 seconds, I have time to tell one story and one story only.
This is the stop I was on. She was scared, but at the end of the day she was very pleased.
I’m glad she wasn’t sitting on a kilo of cocaine. I’m glad she didn’t come out guns a blazin.
“Barbie Dolls! I show you some God damned Barbie Dolls”
Ha.
The probable cause for that imaginary stop might make for an interesting court room debate.
Toys not tickets.
Tis the season to force good will down our throats.
Merry Christmas everyone.
Life’s Crazy™