You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
Prometheus!
The movie – not the mythological God.
In ancient Greece, Prometheus is known as the protector and benefactor of man. He gave mankind a number of gifts including fire.
This movie is not a gift and perhaps the script should have been burned.
Like ancient legend, Prometheus the movie should have been chained to an Eagle that eats away at a celluloid carcass for all eternity.
In the movie, Prometheus is the name of the space ship that will take a crew of 17 to a far a way world. It’s here that scientists believe they will find the “engineers”, those who created humanity.
The previews make you think this film is a must see. Space and dramatic music and special effects, it’s got to be titillating.
And it has space hottie, Charlize Theron. It doesn’t get much better than that, right.
The trailer makes you think it is an instant summer time block buster. It’s the new Avengers – NOT.
The film was crafted by renowned director Ridley Scott. It should be sensational.
Prometheus falls flat, cast out of Mt Olympus and theaters all across America.
It does what almost every meandering big budget Hollywood film does. It begins with promise and mystery. It draws you in and the first 28 minutes are engaging.
But then the challenge for filmmakers comes; the next 60 minutes of story telling. And it is here that Prometheus sags. There is little character development.
I don’t care about any of the characters, and in most scenes, where they wear space suits, I cannot even tell what character is speaking.
All movies must have a story and this story is never fully realized.
It goes flat like a tire over a spike strip.
The film questions creation. Instead, it sort of tells a story about Alien face sucking monsters and gigantic humanoids who inexplicably hate humans.
The story is convoluted and unclear. The motivation of the protagonists is questionable. There’s a bad robot, perhaps the most compelling character of the movie. There’s an old CEO who pretends to be dead but really stows away. It’s a weak premise. There’s an ice queen space daughter whose motivation for coming to this foreboden world is never clearly established. And there is a frozen alien containing the genetic blue print of human kind who wakes up and then begins to go on a kill all humans at all costs rampage.
Why? Who cares? What’s going on?
It’s visually enticing, but when you pull back the illuminated curtain, I expected more from Ridley Scott, the director of Alien.
In the original Alien, the mission was clear. Company wants acid spewing space aliens brought back to Earth to create super weapon. Sigourney Weaver is a sympathetic character you can root for. It is frightening and well executed.
This film should have been executed.
They say nobody can hear you scream in space, but you could sure could hear groans in the theater.
Ouch.
The story ends with a clear set up for the next film. It should have ended with a big Graphic that reads: Sorry to have wasted your time. Money back in the lobby.
And that is crazy.™