You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
All the time spent investigating sports stars whose careers are over.
Barry Bonds. Mark McGwire. Lance Armstrong.
What a waste of time?
Have we run out of things to do in this life? Did I miss something? Did we find a cure for cancer and nobody told me about it?
Did all the child molesters get scooped up and incinerated on the island of good riddance?
According to the most recent news reports, the US Attorney’s office has suddenly and unceremoniously dropped its investigation into 7 time tour de france champ, Lance Armstrong.
Armstrong basically said thanks for dropping the case, now I can go back to a life of celebrity and fighting cancer and I told you so.
It makes you wonder, why the hell did the feds give a damn in the first place.
Armstrong smoked every other cyclist in the world for a generation. He rode up 45 degree mountain cliffs like a billy goat with suction cups.
He rode past chumps who can’t pedal their way out of a paper peloton. They lost badly and they got pissed and they cast aspersions on his character.
“We can’t ride that fast, so he cannot possibly ride that fast so he must be doping,” They alleged publicly like whining little babies.
Well excuse me, but in cycling circles, PED’s are like Flinstone multi vitamins. It’s part of doing business right?
Did Lance take drugs? Honestly I don’t care.
What I do care about is how much energy the department of justice is wasting on investigating a bike rider who retired years ago. He is a bike rider, not the president of the United States. He is a bike rider, not a CEO of a petroleum company ripping you and me off at the pumps.
What? Are they pissed cause he dumped Sheryl Crowe?
What is to be gained here? It looks like grand standing to me. The Justice Department had a big ole press conference complete with caviar wishes and champagne dreams to announce the launch of its lofty investigation. But when their rail car of stupid went off the tracks, there is barely a tweet.
How much time was wasted G men? How much of my tax payer dollars did you squander? And for what?
To maybe tell me that an athlete uses performance enhancing drugs to ride a bike? That’s like telling me TV anchors like to watch themselves on TV.
Why don’t you investigate Hulk Hogan next. Tell me if those 30 inch biceps are all hard work and pumping iron?
The same goes for Barry Bonds and Roger Clemons. Who cares. why is Barry’s head so big? Sure Roger has a temperament issue, so does a German Sheppard. Let it go. It’s a baseball issue. It’s not like it’s going to matter if Israel bombs Iran and we get drawn into another bloody sand battle over seas right?
It’s a waste of time. It’s a waste of money.
Do me a favor United States Attorney Generals. Go after douche bags who hurt kids. Prosecute them with the vigor that you reserve for bike riders and guys whose heads don’t fit into a normal sized batting helmet.
Catch the guys who are skimming our credit cards and committing identity theft. Go after the on line sexual predators who trick our kids on Facebook into meeting them at an undisclosed location in the woods. Spend the money neutering every father who touches his daughter inappropriately.
Hey US Attorney’s office, there are a lot of ways to spend your time and my money.
Forget your flashy press conference, put on your track shoes and start catching some real bad guys.
And that is crazy.