You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
Mad Max.
And boy is Max Mad.
He won’t say he’s sorry because he isn’t sorry.
What’s he not sorry about? He’s not sorry about how he danced on Dancing with the Stars.
The whole thing’s as masculine as a pink thong, but apparently Max or Maksim Chmerkovskiy as he’s known on his passport, didn’t like the snipes of the DWTS judges.
Max dances with women’s soccer star, Hope Solo. And after what Max thought was a well choreographed routine, the judges treated her like they treat toilet paper.
Judge Len Goodman said this: “Hope, I’ve never lost faith in you. I always feel like there is so much there, and for some reason it hasn’t come out.”
He added, “This is your worst dance of the season in my opinion.”
The audience booed and Macks encouraged them to go off on the old man.
That’s when dance fever got hot and Mad Maksim went off, declaring he was tired of the judges “little” comments.
That’s when Old man Lenny says; “I’ve been in this business for 50 years.”
Which is when dancing boy says; “Then maybe it’s time to go!”
As far as hard hitting exchanges go, this one is akin to a tupperware party at the YMCA, but as far as DWTS goes, this was a public execution in chop chop square.
The tabloids went crazy with this calling it everything from DANCE WAR to MAX’s FIRESTORM to BALL ROOM BRAWL.
Some fun, don’t you think?
Some thought Mad Macks should apologize and Macks told Robin Roberts on GMA, the last time I apologized was to my grandma on her death bed.
Yeah so take that old man Lenny. Take your 50 years and shove em where the sun don’t shine and your trick knee could never hope to go.
The judges are not kind when they see a dance they don’t like, and I guess when you practice for 14 hours a day and then someone just chews you up like a puppy chews an old shoe, well sometimes you lose your dancing cool.
Bruno was equally as mean when he looked right at Chaz Bono and said “Watching you dance is like watching a cute penguin who is a cute bird of prey.”
What?
Mad Macks questioned why he couldn’t speak his mind when the judges get to say whatever the hell they want.
The exchange has tabloids percolating and out of work drag queens lighting up the DWTS message boards. ABC loves it cause even idiots like me who hate DWTS are talking about it and writing about it.
So how do we settle this?
I want to see Lenny and Mad Macks stand back to back and to the theme of Metallica’s Sandman I want them to take ten paces, turn and shoot each other with party confetti.
The man with the most amount of manhood and respect left gets to dance on, the loser has to go shine shoes on a street corner in San Francisco, where men are men and hot dancers with a tight ass get their drinks paid for.
And that is crazy.