You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
Wall to wall porn.
Graphic, X rated, jiggling.
Hard core on every monitor, glistening in a high definition gyration, with surround sound and HD intensity.
Sounds like a perp’s dream right?
So why is wall to wall porn a problem you are asking yourself?
Because this visual hump-a-thon was happening on every flat screen at the Best Buy in Greenville South Carolina.
Madagascar 3 was suddenly replaced by HOT LICKS AND PRETTY CHICKS 4!
Can you imagine walking into your local best buy to get a thumb drive and suddenly it’s Debbie does Dallas across the entire back wall.
Sources say, hackers infiltrated the store WI-FI. They apparently penetrated the complex defenses of globally important box store giant, BEST BUY.
According to the Best Buy’s corporate office, two individuals accessed the store’s wireless signal to broadcast “inappropriate content” on a smart television display.
I am not sure inappropriate covers the 30 minute orgasmatron beaming across the back of the entire store.
Best Buy management apologized profusely saying it won’t happen again.
Wow what a relief. Now I can get back to Little Mermaid – the forgotten years.
So that should be the end of this lurid story, just another example of technology and porn gone bad.
But of course this story has an alternate ending.
Gloria Berg was in the store that day. Apparently this grandma isn’t a big fan of bumping and grinding nasty’s 10 feet tall.
The senior says she was looking at a 55-inch TV with her grandchildren when a graphic photo of a man and woman suddenly appeared.
The couple was fornicating in 3-D. Her grand kids began having seizures. Apparently 10 foot tall sexual miscreants performing unspeakable acts in High Def is not that acceptable in Greenville.
Maybe that’s even when Gloria started getting the vapors.
Berg is quoted as saying, “They, like, brush it off … Nobody cares. It’s pornography. And we are getting adjusted to that kind of mentality. That’s why we are losing our morals.”
Berg said the image stayed up for several minutes before a manager took it down.
Up – Down? Make up your mind Berg.
You think Berg was getting a little turned on? Maybe a lot pissed off.
I’m OK with Gloria being upset. But I think it sucks that she is suing the store because some pornography pirates figured out how to broadcast high definition humping.
I wonder if she would sue Best Buy if the porn pirates infiltrated the homeless shelter’s wifi?
What are you gonna sue for then? Turkey pot pies? Old boots?
Do me a favor do gooders. Do good, for the right reasons. Do it because couples copulating in 1080i is too much to gaze upon for most humans. Don’t call the news or your local ambulance chaser because its an easy way to cash in.
Big Box Porn.
If we let 10 foot tall acts of salaciousness bother us, haven’t the porn pirates all ready won?
That is crazy.™