You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
Bacon Air.™
Imagine bong hitting the very essence of pork, inhaling the vapor of pig, ingesting molecules of sizzling swine.
A company that lives and dies bacon is allowing customers to do just that.
Now you don’t have to throw a pound of pork into the skillet and wave the vapors up your nose. For $8.99 a canister you can infuse the pleasurable aroma of pork right into your lungs. It’s like hiring a tiny hooker to massage your nasal cavity with bacon scented hands.
The brain trust behind bacon flavored oxygen is a guy named Justin and a guy named David. Two ordinary Joes who obviously have a bacon fetish that will one day be the focal point of HBO’s Real Sex.
These self proclaimed Bacontrepreuners from J&D’s Foods brought you bacon salt and bacon-mayonnaise. The premise is why just have bacon when you are eating bacon. Why not slather your ham sandwich with bacon and sprinkle bacon on your bacon and eggs. And now, if standing over a hot frying pan to get your fix is not for you, the bad boys of bacon present: Bacon Air –An oxygenated infusion of bacon-scented O2 that helps you live while satisfying your blood lust for breakfast foods that rock.
“We were inspired to develop BaconAir after learning about advancements in breathable chocolate, vitamins and coffee by gastro scientists at Le Whifin Paris,” one of the owners says in a press release. “If the French could make breathable coco, then it was up to us (and by us, we mean America) to bring the bacon flavored O2.”
Well if it’s America versus France, I say screw France and breathe up all the bacon you can people. it’s a matter of civic pride. The French brought us Chanel, J&D are bringing us ingestible, inhalable, infusible pork fragrence.
OINK-A-LICIOIUS!
The tongue and cheek email continues: “Oxygen is the most important nutrient to the cells in your body, and plays an integral role in almost every bodily function. And bacon is the most delicious of meats. Was combining these two elements possible or even advisable? Fortunately, the answer was yes on both counts.”
The canister is shaped like a dairy silo or tornado siren and covered with intoxicating photos of bacon simmering in the pan. The canister makes you want to touch it, to put it to your lips, to inhale. It looks like a a fire extinguisher for the in crowd.
The web site touts the benefits of breathable bacon as:
- Convenient and Easy to Use
- No Calories, Fat or Stimulants
- Non-Prescription
- Maximum Deliciousness
and to make sure some lucky bacon lover knows it, the company is giving away a lifetime supply of bacon air to one sure to be fired up bacon-ista.
“You can live without water or salt but oxygen you need. And bacon is what I cannot live without”, says either Justin or Dave.
“it is a health product with Zero calories and no fat,” says either Dave or Justin.
As the boys from J and D say it’s one of the healthiest ways ever invented to consume one of the baddest ass meat products ever invented.
no word on whether the scent also comes in Canadian flavored bacon?
and that is crazy!