You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™
How men and women drive.
If you think the sexes drive the same, just ask All State Insurance.
Why do you think teenage boys have a higher rate than a Charlie Sheen Call girl.
Women are crazy and men are idiots and we drive that way.
It’s because men drive hard and fast. Men are inherent risk takers. Men might talk on a cell phone, but rarely do we also shave and check balance our checkbooks at 80mph. Quite frankly, men don’t multi task as well as women. A man could never drive to work while applying mascara and putting together a real estate deal.
Women can do this in their sleep. Women drive cautiously but with purpose. But they also file their nails, write down their grocery list, text a girlfriend, register on a bridal boutique and apply lip gloss, all before they even use that first blinker.
I think that driving is a little like sex. Men are hard and fast and get to where they are going quickly, usually spent and out of gas.
Women get to their destination, with plenty left in the tank, the car just warming up ready for another lap around the neighborhood.
Men like their cars like they like their women – fast and tight and sleek and sexy. We like a lot of rubber on the pavement and an engine that purrs loudly.
Women like their cars like they like their men – safe and predictable and always ready to start when they crank it over. Women like a vehicle where they know if they hit the accelerator, all pistons are firing and acceleration is a toe tap away.
So the next time you see a woman applying mascara on her way to work while texting her girlfriends in the diamond lane – don’t get mad – be impressed. Know that the woman you think is a road hazard is really more talented behind the wheel than you can ever dream to be.
And that is crazy.™