You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy?™
Bounties in the NFL. Why is this news?
The allegation is that NFL players were paid extra for big hits that put rival players out of the game.
Bounties in the NFL? That’s news like New York City cab drivers can’t speak English is news.
I wake up this morning to the ESPN Sports Reporters droning on about an NFL investigation, reportedly 50,000 pages of dead trees, that shows New Orleans Saints Defensive Coach Greg Williams sanctioned a bounty system.
A bounty in the NFL? I like the idea. I want my NFL player to be a crazed dog. I want them hyped up on Red Bull and the fear of Jesus.
These guys are paid professionals. They are already well compensated to lay the wood. A bounty in the NFL is like leaving your waiter a tip for bringing extra bread. So What?
From what I read, the bounties did not include maiming or trying to cripple opposing players. The idea of the bounty was to provide even more incentive for a big hit, a legal hit, possibly a knock out hit.
Love it!
These modern day centurions get a W-2 for wiping memories clean. If it’s legal, then give me more. Knock some snot. Loosen some teeth. Maybe a slight cranial bleed.
To legislate this incentive would be like taking away a salesman’s bonus for selling the most copiers.
The difference, the copier salesman doesn’t sell a copier so viciously that the other guy pees blood.
Nobody wants anyone to get maimed. I believe there is a legal way to play the game at full speed and as a fan that is what I want. I want full speed, I want that human NASCAR crash into the wall. I want that 200 miles an hour intensity of bone jarring insanity.
Anything less and I’m yawning bro. I might as well be knitting.
There is no evidence that the bounty hits were illegal. And that’s the rub. People just don’t like the word bounty.
Unless you’ve spilled grape juice on the counter. Then it’s the quicker picker upper.
Regardless. The NFL comissioner is pissed.
Roger Goodell said it is our responsibility to protect player safety and the integrity of our game.
NFL insider; Chris Mortenson says, the league is serious about cracking down on everyone involved, and that means serious suspensions.
One former player said “there was a culture of malicious intent.”
It’s the NFL. The entire concept is controlled violence. You want to scrutinize that?
When I played football back in the day, the coaches gave us stickers to put on our helmets for big plays, or big hits.
Is that a bounty?
As a high school boy did I say to myself, “I’m going to bust that guys ass as hard as I legally can because I want the coach to put a sticker on my helmet? F*** Yeah!”
That’s all this is. A sticker, a $1000 sticker for a big hit that sidelines a player, makes him see unicorns and rainbows for a couple of plays.
I’ll tell you this, every quarterback that has ever dropped back in the history of the NFL knows that he is in the cross hairs whether there is a bounty on him or not.
This game is not for the feint of heart or guys looking to wear a skirt.
Bob Ryan of the Boston Globe screeched like a rusty screen door calling news of a bounty “medieval”.
That’s why the NFL is the number on sport in America by a wide margin, because it is medieval. It is violent and barbaric. It is a celebration of that warrior mentality. It is the modern day joust, a gladiator spectacle.
You think anyone cared if the knight on horseback, galloping at full speed with a lance in his hand was promised an extra turkey leg for a punishing blow to the opposing knight?
Get real NFL.
Get on with the real business at hand, like softening your stance on end zone celebrations. Bring back the Icky Shuffle.
The No Fun League continues to try and change the culture of a sport that is entertainingly violent, and acceptably barbaric. Let it go.
And that is crazy.