You know what’s Crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™
National Shirtless Day.
What’s that you ask.
It’s a day of protest, a day of equal rights for women. It’s a day where saggy boobs are set free, like flesh covered melons falling from the trees.
The protest coincides with the date when women got the right to vote in this country.
“As long as men can be topless, constitutionally women should have the same right, or men should also be forced to wear something hiding their chest,” Maitreya, Rael, “spiritual leader” and founder of Go Topless , the group behind Sunday’s annual event, says on the group’s website.
So let me get this straight Ms. Rael. Because men can go topless, women should go topless. That’s it? That’s your arguement?
Because men got to vote women should vote; I get that. But now it’s the rule of monkey see monkey do, so women should also be able to go topless?
Life isn’t that equal Rael.
Under your reasoning, should women urinate standing up? Now that’s a line dance I’d pay to watch.
In theory, most men would say “I love a parade of breasts.”
But honestly, I’ve seen the video from marches past and it is not a thing of beauty.
Quite honestly, the men and women who have chosen to endorse your cause jiggle more than a bowl of jello on a subway train.
Most of these protestors are flabby bags of flesh whose stretch marks have stretch marks.
After viewing some of the video, I want these topless soldiers to cover up. Put away the pasties, put on your tube tops, please.
Major cities taking part include: San Francisco; New York; Austin, Texas ; Los Angeles; Denver; Seattle; Miami, and Chicago .
Topless supporters say boobs should be treated no differently than a woman’s legs or belly button.
“It’s a matter of fairness,” Go Topless director Nadine Gary told AOL News . “We want equal topless rights for all or none.”
I’m ok with topless equal rights.
As long as, for every Wal Mart shopping Spandex wearing, belly jiggling protester, there is at least one hottie.
Now that’s some equal rights I can fully endorse.
And that’s crazy.