You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™
Karma is crazy. What comes around goes around. The ying and yang of the universe.
I like to call it The Crazy Law of Reactivity.
DATELINE: TACOMA, Washington.
A couple catches fire while siphoning gas from a Salvation Army van.
BAM!
CAN YOU SAY KARMA.
Can you say the universe just kicked somebody in the ass!
Witnesses say the van just suddenly exploded.
To the untrained eye, the van just suddenly exploded.
But this was no accident. This was the Crazy Law of Reactivity belching its opinion into the ether. The CLR is an unstoppable universal force that weaves through the fabric of existence and binds us all together on an electric current of energy.
You know why that van suddenly exploded? It exploded because the universe knows what’s right and wrong. The universe governed by CLR is your mother and she rewards you when you do good and she punishes you when you do bad.
The first principle of The Crazy Law of Reactivity states that the energy you project, comes back to you like a flashlight bouncing off a mirror.
Stealing gas from a Salvation Army vehicle? That’s bad mojo, baby. On the sliding scale of inappropriate, it’s only slightly better than stealing from the collection plate. It’s just slightly worse than sliding your hand under the pillow and taking a child’s dollar left by the tooth fairy.
Police spokesman Mark Fulghum told The News Tribune both suspects, the van and a nearby vehicle caught fire. The man was able to put out his own flames and fled before police arrived.
The witness used a garden house to douse the woman. She was taken to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle and is expected to recover.
Firefighters put out the vehicle fires.
Reads like any other petty crime on the police report, but I’m telling you. Vans just don’t explode because you are syphoning gas out of them. Gas doesn’t explode that readilly. If it did, don’t you think all the cell phone talking, cigarette smoking, static-electric clingy people with big thighs, cordorot pants and wool sweaters would be catching fire every time they topped off?
They don’t catch fire because they are buying their gas from Texaco, not stealing it from a charitable organization.
Just know that the vibe you send into the universe is equal to the vibe you get back. If you are positive and cheerful and full of alacrity, the universe will recognize that vibe and send it back to you like a double scoop of chocolate ice cream.
Conversely, if you are dark and pessimistic and duplicity fills your beating heart, then you too will be put in a cosmic time out where spontaneous combustion is possible.
CLR is a lot like Newton’s Third Law of Motion: For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.
This law is exemplified by what happens if we step off a boat onto the bank of a lake: as we move in the direction of the shore, the boat tends to move in the opposite direction (leaving us facedown in the water, if we aren’t careful!).
That’s kind of the universal energy I’m talking about. When you do something bad, it comes back to you in a representative and equal proportion.
So get your act together, be kind ot your fellow man, and keep a cheerful disposition. Otherwise, you might just find yourself bursting into flames.
And that my friend’s is the Crazy Law of Reactivity.