You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™
Waiting 2012 years for the end of the world, then finding out, the group that predicted this dooms-day can’t even get it right.
Stupid Mayans!
DATELINE: EARTH
As many of you know, December 21, 2012, has long been the day the world will end according to the Mayan calendar.
Armegedon parties have all ready been booked.
Hollywood has all ready made the movie!
But now scholars say, hold on to your final-days dinner plans.
According to new research done by Gerardo Aldana, associate professor of Chicana and Chicano Studies at UC Santa Barbara, the date may actually be off by 50 to 100 years.
Only off by 100 years?
Well isn’t that comforting. Why not a year, an hour, a millennium. What a waste of time. Who cares.
Stupid Mayans.
According to Aldana; “This is likely the result of a mistake from when there was a conversion from Mayan dates to modern ones.”So who feels stupider, the Mayans or the producers of the movie 2012.Aldana in a press release from UC Santa Barbara, said, “One of the principal complications is that there are really so few scholars who know the astronomy, the epigraphy, and the archeology. Because there are so few people who are working on that, you get people who don’t see the full scope of the problem.”
The full scope of the problem? You know why so few people are working on this problem, because there isn’t a problem. The only problem would be if they gave tax payer money to anyone to even pick up a pencil to think a thought to scribble an equation down about the Mayan Mistake.
I for one am glad that the end of days has been temporized. I have a lot of things planned for December 2012. I’ll be buying Christmas presents for kids and new friends. I’ll be decking my halls and creating Yuletide joy with or without the aid of an adult beverage.
So to you long dead Mayan Calendar makers, I’m sorry your Armageddon dates are so screwed up.
Like I have always said, what’s bad for the Mayans is good for the rest of us Earthlings, many of whom can barely set an alarm clock.
The Mayan Mistake means more time to sleep without the end of the world gravitational force squeezing our skulls.
The Mayan Mistake means manana still lives strong in the hearts and minds of every lazy American, who would rather put off till tomorrow something they should have done today.
The Mayan Mistake means I get to pay more taxes into a system that is set up by people stupider than the Mayan Calendar prediction squad.
Happy 2012 everyone.
And that is crazy!