You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy. ™ Psychic Sheep! They bother me, much like elephants that never forget and cats who waste lives they should otherwise preserve. Psychic Sheep? Try saying that 3 times fast. So what makes a walking lamb chop so prescient? Cancer. BAAAAAA. DATELINE:Wiltshire, England. It’s here that a taciturn sheep is being hailed […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™Broadcasting your every random thought across the friendly skies. Imagine opening your libido, flushing your mind, and filtering it through your manhood. Then take that volatile mess and mix it in your potty mouth. Now imagine you spit that venom into the atmosphere, naming names and bluntly saying what […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Spending 5 hours tailing a work van. My day starts at 7:45 am. I am in a WalMart Parking lot. It’s here I’ve been told that the carpet cleaners come to cash their pay checks. The tipster tells me that the men clean carpets, and when […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™Throwing out the first pitch. We’ve all seen presidents throw out the first pitch at the All Star game and Opening Day. President Bush brought the heat. President Obama threw like a girl. We’ve seen celebrities bang the brains of gophers bouncing the ball up to the […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy™ Giving elderly hospital patients a tambourine as part of their health care plan. Who sponsors this health care? The Osmonds? Tamboourines? What ever happened to the electronic call buttons they have on each hospital bed? Does that electric pulse really rack up so many health care […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy. The Hangover II I did something I rarely do. I went to an early movie by myself. I end up meeting a friend who joins me in a theater that has less action than a kissing booth at a senior citizen’s home. Let me say this […]
You know what’s Crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy!™Sports cars and speed.As far as that goes, It’s been a good week .A week ago, I’m driving a Jaguar XKR convertible down Pacific Coast Highway into Big Sur. Six days later, I’m driving a Porsche Cayman through the back woods around Nashville, Tennessee.All work and no play […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Winning a $22,000 in a fishing tournament. The year is 1986. The place is The Great Barrier Reef in Australia. The water is a blue that Crayola doesn’t have a name for. The sky at night is rich like pudding with stars that hang so low […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy. Father’s Day in a Mother’s world. Sunday June 19th was Father’s day. Dad’s all over this country got cards and breakfast in bed. Phone calls rang and text messages chimed. While we father’s appreciate Father’s Day, we are not under any misconceptions. We realize that when it […]
You know what’s crazy? I’ll tell you what’s crazy.™ Weiner’s Weiner. When Anthony Weiner tweeted pictures of his manhood, the world came off its axis. The media confronted him. He lied. They confronted him again with proof of his legislative package, and he finally came clean. He thought he could weather the fire storm of […]